8 humiliating things

should i blog abt this or not?

something happened last thursday, after work session in the parliament. i rather not describe what that was ... however there are a few scenes and thoughts that keep on replaying in my mind since then.

1. macam mana...aku bleh terpegang ... bukan pegang kot ... it's probably more of tergenggam tangan my male colleague sekuat-kuatnye masa that incident berlaku? sape yang start genggam sape aku pun tatau ah. and i don't know how long that lasted tapi most probably kejap je kot .. tah. tapi malu gile okay. aku rasa dua-dua tak prasan pasal terkejut sangat kot. dahla boss ade kat belakang. argh.

2. macam mana ... aku bleh terbabble "oh shit. oh shit. shit shit shitttttt" lepas incident tu ... without realizing that my boss is behind me? arghh. now this is serious shitty malu okei. lepas ni me nak kena mantra bende-bende baik sajo ... so that if anything emergency happens in the future, my subconscious mind will say bende-bende baik je ...

3. i lost my k3wlness. k3wl ke pwincess selama ni? haha. not sure but at least i maintain my composure all this while.

4. pwincess kena bebel dengan male colleague? mcm mana tu? argh. panas je telinge ...

5. big boss gave supportive words ... thank god! but still. it's so humiliating okei. pasal ni fes time it was on me, and such thing happened. i think i was jinxed. tah ape la boss ni pikir pasai aku .. hua hua hua

6. to top it off, a few of colleagues kat opis pun dah tau psl bende tu. arghhhhhhh!! if those who don't know, i am someone who actually care what other people's perception towards me .. sometimes la. sometimes, tak jugak. tu kire dah tahap malas nak layan ah.

7. sorry but no, i'm not sorry for what had happened. i'm sorry i caused such trouble to prince H, tapi me still don't think i am at fault. ni jenis degil hardcore ke ape ke ... i'm not sure. sume tu salah third party ... betul....tak tipu. i was in control of everything, and prince H pun said that i am skilful ... tapi bile ade third party yang caused trouble, nak buat macam mana?

8. now it comes back to number 6 and number 7, i'm not sure what my colleague and my boss would think of my attitude since i keep on saying it's not my fault, it's the third party's fault. ye lah ... kalau salah orang lain ,patut ke kita ngaku tu salah kita. ah no no, that is simply not me.

macam mana ......... nak erase sume bende yang humiliating ni ehkkk .. adoi yai.